Vol. XL · No. 1The Dad DispatchFather's Day Edition
Reigning best dad, North American division

Happy Father's Day,
Poo!

Forty years of tennis, a lifetime of being right, and somehow still the humble one. Today's all yours, Dad.

See our story
0+years on the court
0+rallies and counting
0%of the time, right
On the court

His game

Chases down every ball, argues every line call, wins more than he should. The man can play.

A+

The serve

First thing anyone mentions after playing him. Still terrifying.

Never tires

Five sets deep and still fresh, then asks if you've eaten.

#1

A regular

At the courts every weekend. Wins, then stays two hours to chat.

Want a game?

Proper scoring: 15, 30, 40, deuce. First to 4 games wins the set.

Mode
Difficulty

Mouse, touch, or ↑ / ↓ to move your racket.

You 0Set · first to 4 gamesMachine 0
Mouse / Touch keysLongest rally: 0
In the market

The POO Index

His other sport. The one holding that's never let us down, and the rare time past performance does guarantee future results.

$9,841
+1,260% all time
NYSE: DAD

What he's really invested in

FAMFamily Inc.
+∞%
ACETennis Holdings
+204%
BBQWeekend Grilling Co.
+88%
NAPSunday Rest ETF
+57%
DADDad Jokes Ltd.
+9,001%

Not financial advice. Extremely emotional advice. 💚

Invest in $DAD

Go on, buy a few shares of Dad. The returns here are purely emotional.

Shares owned0
Your stake$0
Tap to buy your first share.
From me to you

Dad, I'm not great at saying this stuff out loud. So here it is in writing, where you can keep it.

On the court or in the market, you make it all look easy. You've been my coach, my voice of reason, and the person I want to be. Thank you, Dad.

With all my love, on Father's Day.

One last thing under here. Go on, scratch it.

You're not just good at tennis and stocks. You're my favorite person, full stop. Happy Father's Day, Poo.